The System Is Broken

We live in a world where addicts and criminals are given endless programs, second chances, housing, therapy, job training, and government funding. Society pours resources into “rehabilitating” those who have harmed others—while the people they harmed are left to pick up the pieces with nothing.

Survivors of abuse are not only abandoned, they are punished.

• Courts label them as “high conflict.”

• Therapists often gaslight them into “forgiveness” before safety is restored.

• Systems shame them for struggling, calling it “noncompliance.”

• Their nervous system responses—normal after trauma—are mistaken for pathology.

• And when they fight for their safety, they are framed as the problem.

Meanwhile, the abuser gets endless treatment opportunities, probation, mandated programs, even housing stipends. The addict gets rehab, halfway houses, and a re-entry plan. The criminal gets legal protections, advocates, and reintegration pathways.

The survivor? No income support. No legal defense fund. No nervous-system repair program. No housing pipeline. Often, no safe community at all.

We are a society that rewards harm and punishes survival. We call it “justice” when we hand resources to the offender, but we call it “conflict” when the victim dares to demand safety.

This is not justice. It is systemic betrayal.

If we want to end cycles of violence, we must stop resourcing the abuser while starving the survivor. Until we build systems that center the abused—not just the abuser—we will keep punishing the very people who carried the heaviest burden and survived anyway.

How to Finally Get Help as a Survivor

Step 1: Don’t be a survivor. Be a criminal.

Step 2: Get addicted to something. Anything.

Step 3: Harm enough people that the system takes notice.

Congratulations—you now qualify for:

• Free housing.

• Court advocates.

• Job training programs.

• Therapy on demand.

• Endless “second chances.”

• Community sympathy.

Meanwhile, if you’re just the person who was strangled, stalked, gaslit, left homeless, and raising kids alone? Sorry—no funding for you. No programs for you. No safety net. In fact, you’ll probably be called “unstable” and punished in family court for daring to speak up.

So maybe the message is clear: if you want resources in this society, don’t be a survivor. Be the addict. Be the offender. Break things. Hurt people. Then you’ll get the red-carpet treatment.

It would almost be funny… if it wasn’t the truth.

Carey Ann George